im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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