I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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