I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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