and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize