she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize