How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i would punch a child for taco bell
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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