the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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