wanna go halves on a baby?
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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