idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
my poor anus
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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