okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize