1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize