so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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