There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
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