actually, I'm a sock model
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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