69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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