Texts From Last Night

Last Night in California (951)

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  (951): View more from California

  I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.

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  (951): I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on. http://tfl.nu/klvy
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  (951): View more from California

  I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.

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  (951): I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him. http://tfl.nu/aa9y
  Replies (34) Good night (3044) Bad night (4583) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.

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  (951): I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes. http://tfl.nu/5gti
  Replies (25) Good night (616) Bad night (3293) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am

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  (951): ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am http://tfl.nu/357a
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  (951): View more from California

  Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.

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  (951): Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out. http://tfl.nu/nz84
  Replies (22) Good night (4317) Bad night (656) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.

  (951): View more from California

  Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.

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  (951): Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night. (951): Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended. http://tfl.nu/dcrw
  Replies (24) Good night (1409) Bad night (2318)
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  (951): View more from California

  hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.

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  (951): hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit. http://tfl.nu/lqvy
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  (951): View more from California

  Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.

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  (951): Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already. http://tfl.nu/bhvw
  Replies (64) Good night (4831) Bad night (797)
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  (951): View more from California

  Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?

  (949): View more from California

  Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.

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  (951): Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn? (949): Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER. http://tfl.nu/x4x0
  Replies (29) Good night (976) Bad night (3770)
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  (951): View more from California

  yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.

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  (951): yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye. http://tfl.nu/mzng
  Replies (63) Good night (1473) Bad night (10033) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  what ever happened to devon sawa?

  (415): View more from California

  fuck...who knows?

  (951): View more from California

  i'm really worried about him.

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  (951): what ever happened to devon sawa? (415): fuck...who knows? (951): i'm really worried about him. http://tfl.nu/sfvp
  Replies (56) Good night (1117) Bad night (1569)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.

  (951): View more from California

  sound pretty economical

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  (434): Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood. (951): sound pretty economical http://tfl.nu/xtyc
  Replies (11) Good night (2946) Bad night (467)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  we are all sexual creatures

  (951): View more from California

  yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.

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  (360): we are all sexual creatures (951): yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any. http://tfl.nu/bk7c
  Replies (9) Good night (571) Bad night (2686)
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  (707): View more from California

  I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.

  (951): View more from California

  That's the thing about women.

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  (707): I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff. (951): That's the thing about women. http://tfl.nu/3r0z
  Replies (6) Good night (664) Bad night (2336)
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  (951): View more from California

  I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?

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  (951): I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right? http://tfl.nu/4fsw
  Replies (22) Good night (2342) Bad night (609) Order T-Shirt