Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (209)

Last Night in California (209)

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(209): View more from California

dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity

(1-209): View more from California

nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all

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(209): dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity (1-209): nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all http://tfl.nu/t93h

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what is college for if not random hookup sex?

(951): View more from California

learning.

(209): View more from California

i would literally fuck learning if i could.

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(209): what is college for if not random hookup sex? (951): learning. (209): i would literally fuck learning if i could. http://tfl.nu/3rtk

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this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.

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(209): this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not. http://tfl.nu/74g7

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I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.

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(209): I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him. http://tfl.nu/e78z

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do you want me to make hamburgers?

(541): View more from Oregon

i'm vegan

(209): View more from California

i'll put lettuce on them

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(209): do you want me to make hamburgers? (541): i'm vegan (209): i'll put lettuce on them http://tfl.nu/hb72

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I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.

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(209): I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart. http://tfl.nu/dd9c

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Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.

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(209): Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future. http://tfl.nu/yuzg

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His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.

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(209): His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it. http://tfl.nu/5398

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I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.

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(209): I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope. http://tfl.nu/7xzu

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kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.

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(209): kindergarten is hard when you're hung over. http://tfl.nu/68v6

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I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life

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(209): I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life http://tfl.nu/mnvk

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I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.

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(209): I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two. http://tfl.nu/goqt

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Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.

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(209): Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night. http://tfl.nu/9abu

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nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw

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(209): nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw http://tfl.nu/vicw

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is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?

(1-209): View more from California

yes...dear jesus what did you do?

(209): View more from California

bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.

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(209): is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers? (1-209): yes...dear jesus what did you do? (209): bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off. http://tfl.nu/27hf

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Last Night in California (209)

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