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  • 83 57
    Submitted by Authoress on Oct 20, 10 at 3:59am

    Wow, what an A-hole.

  • 82 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 14, 09 at 8:50am

    Stole this from Dane Cook. . .wow for once someone stole a joke from Dane Cook . . instead of the other way around

  • 93 85
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 28, 09 at 6:15pm

    Actually know of a guy that sent me a similar text with the same area code in Maryland. The story was total truth, he got fired...

  • 72 46
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 9:48pm

    I can vouch for it...Know the dude that posted it...It's 100% real.

  • 82 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 3:29pm

    hope the vodka was al ot smoother than your talking.

  • 81 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 4:44pm

    I call bullshit on this one.

  • 79 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 4:59pm

    this is totally fake. who did you text this to? you a-holes are making this less funny.

  • 79 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 4:47pm

    yeah, bullshit.. no one is this dumb. no matter how drunk.

  • 78 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 15, 09 at 10:07am

    I love this txt. Hahaha.

  • 69 51
    Submitted by [][][] on Jun 28, 10 at 4:07am

    fuck all of the "fake" people. stop being thundercunts and stop trolling. I could care less if it was fake, it was funny as fuck.

  • 90 94
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 3:34pm

    when did any of that thought seem like a good idea?

  • 70 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 31, 10 at 1:51am

    That's how shit is ran in Baltimore

  • 73 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 16, 09 at 11:57am

    who cares if its real or not. i laughed my ass off

  • 73 68
    Submitted by PercivalJenkins on Mar 1, 10 at 6:24pm

    By far the best txt on TFLN ever. Love it.

  • 78 78
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 27, 09 at 6:50pm

    Bullshit....they put this fake ass text up and refuse to post my legit texts my buddy and I exchanged after running a train on a girl with a jesus fish tattoo on her vag.

  • 73 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 3, 09 at 12:00am

    LOL real or fake still funny

  • 85 95
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 5:54pm

    vp= vice president. seek help.

  • 75 76
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 27, 09 at 2:45pm

    i dont blame him. sometimes you just have the urge to skull fuck

  • 76 78
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 27, 09 at 12:02pm

    Chicks with one eye are hot. That empty eye socket is like a 4th hole.

  • 82 91
    Submitted by anu on Jan 17, 10 at 3:35pm

    You sir are amazing.

  • 77 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 27, 09 at 2:00am

    you're an idiot. not vodka's fault, YOUR fault.

  • 68 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 1:03pm

    ocular penatration FTL

  • 71 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 7:52pm

    He must want you to skull fuck his wife....

  • 61 53
    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 23, 09 at 11:22am

    The best txt ever! I love this one. Haha.

  • 68 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 4:18pm

    Ummmm, Deet Dee Dee 4:03.....Vice President!

  • 72 77
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 3:25pm

    only a guy would be that stupid, vodka or not that's taking it too far. Who the hell skull fucks anymore? Really.

  • 76 88
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 5:43pm

    what an idiot! if this is real he totally deserved to get fired

  • 70 81
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 2:24am

    Nice work, you Tucker Max wannabe.

  • 74 90
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:44pm

    that seemed like an FML....so not cool dude

  • 62 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 4:34pm

    You have only yourself to blame.

  • 76 95
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 5:39pm

    fake! and if it's real you are stupid! grow up!

  • 64 76
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 7, 09 at 5:00pm

    This sounds like something my ex-roommate would do.

  • 64 77
    Submitted by Anonymous on May 31, 09 at 6:09pm

    If any douchebag tried to skullfuck me, I'd walk away with part of his dick in my teeth. I control the head, not men.

  • 62 77
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 4, 09 at 5:49pm

    skullfuck does not mean usually mean mouth.... I would go for an eyesocket

  • 53 75
    Submitted by creeperbug on Mar 2, 10 at 12:31am

    hahahahahaha!!! Love vodka, even more now because this text made my whole day, way to go Vodka haha!

  • 45 71
    Submitted by mistyv on Jun 21, 10 at 2:36am

    Wow thanks to this complete jack ass, there is now one more available job in this shitty economy. U sir are an enormous ass pirate.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 3:34am

    4:18, you spelled dee dee dee wrong, you dee dee dee.