I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize