Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
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Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
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It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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