Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Dignity is for republicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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