I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
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Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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