maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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