if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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