Sponge bath it is.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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