Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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