I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize