Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize