i will never coherently bang her
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
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He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
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I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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