I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize