She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize