Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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