So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
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