So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize