I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
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If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
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Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
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