You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
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The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
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It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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