I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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