If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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