Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize