I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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