Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
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He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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