what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
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I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
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