their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Randomize