Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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