Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize