If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
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