Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize