now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize