I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize