I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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